Sometimes I feel like I'm going to fail my Boards and other times I feel not stressed about it one bit. I have 0 (ZERO) patients lined up starting on Tuesday. I'm not even stressing about my boards patient, just patients in general to fill my chair. That's about it on the school front.

I had such a fun time with Olivia this weekend. She is waking up at 7:40 now, which is like heaven after having spent the last year and half waking up anywhere from 5:00 to 6:00 with her.

So yesterday I actually woke up on my own. That is the first time EVER that I've done that. I basically use her as my alarm clock, but not yesterday. Then she woke up in a very pleasant mood. I made her a strawberry yogurt/banana/milk/spinach smoothie. At first she wouldn't drink it because it was green, so I hid it in her pink sippy cup and she gobbled it right down. (on days when I'm too tired to think, I stick her in her highchair with a handful of cinnamon toast crunch or marshmallow mateys {of which she will only eat the marshmallows}). I felt so good, I cleaned while she watched "The cat in the hat", and had the first round of vacuuming done before 9!

We got to have some cute little friends come over at 10 (we're doing a babysitting trade-off that has been such a help to us). I think Olivia is more well-behaved when she gets to have friends over. Mommy and Daddy are fun, but not quite the same as someone closer to her own age :)

We took a walk (pretty scary when in the first 3 seconds child # 1 falls, child # 2 runs left, and child # 3 runs right). We held hands making a chain and had a really nice nature walk. By the time we got back inside it was livy's nap time, and our little friends left soon after that. Then I did round 2 of vacuuming.

Olivia woke up from her nap in a good mood but she was sad that her friends were gone. She has learned how to play by herself, but still likes us to play with her sometimes. It has made doing housework so much easier when I don't have to have her on my hip. What a treat to have a clean house! Even though we have to vacuume at least 2 times a day.

After making and eating dinner, we watched "My dog skip" and played some more. When Will first gets the little puppy in the movie, Olivia went crazy pointing. jumping, and yelling "ruff ruff"! Then she threw her head back and puckered up. I told her to just blow kisses to the doggie. She hit my hand away and continued to pucker and bounce/jump desperately. I gave in and lifted her to the tv to give the doggie a kiss.

Next it was bath time! Olivia has had a love hate relationship with bath time. Currently it is LOVE, and she splashed the night away. I love seeing her have so much fun! Afterwards, I put her yummy lotion on (she calls it rub rub) and her footie pajamas, and off to bed she went. No tears at "night night" time. Just kisses and cuddles.

I noticed her tiny handprint on the TV, but I couldn't bring myself to wash it off. Its just so sweet. When Brady got home he noticed it immediately and I told him the story. He didn't wash it off either :)

This week's favorite photos

 Just look at that hair! As unruly as it is, I will be so sad when she finally has to have her first haircut and its no longer the wild, unpredictable (sometimes curly, sometimes not), mess that we've come to love and adore.

 Below: Those are Liv's 'mad eyes'. We've legally changed her name to "Mad Eye Moody" (jokes).

I'm so thankful for this little angel. Although I vent about how hard it is to be in school (an all time consuming one) and be a mother, I would be so lost without her.

She is the reason I continue. She is the reason I am pushing myself so hard right now, and the only reason I drag myself to school in the morning. She is the reason I'm not overly stressed about my next set of Boards. She has brought so much peace and JOY to our home.

I know I pretty much write the same thing all the time, but I think its important one day when she reads this, that she KNOWS how much I needed her to be here right this very second. She is my life! I love her more than words could ever explain.

My favorite day

There are just too many things I don't want to forget.

 So here are pictures from my favorite day this week: Sunday. 

Me and my baby playing after church
(yes I will call her a baby until I have another one, even though technically she's not. 
SO cliche to say this, but she will ALWAYS be my baby).

Lately Liv has been a naughty little girl. 

She's clingy, and screams a lot, and wants to be held non-stop. For example, she is sitting on my lap on the couch and then screams and points to a toy she wants on the other side of the room. I set her down so she can go get it, and she screams and cries because I set her down and she wants to be held. I have to carry her to her toy so she can pick it while I'm still holding her, and then sit on the ground, still holding her while she plays with it.

As frustrating as that is, every time she goes off to bed all I want to do is wake her back up and play some more. And when B finally gets home I can't wait to tell him all the adorable, funny, smart things she did instead of complaining that she took every ounce of my time.
I went to lunch with some friends from school on Friday, and they asked how hard it is to have a baby (babies are on the mind at UCDH since school is ending so soon). I said it was really hard. Now I wish I could take saying that back. Sometimes I feel like I have to prepare people for all the hard things of having babies, but I think most people know its hard. All you really need to know is that it is sooo worth it. If I could go back I would say, "the good always outweighs the bad". All I can really say is that you just won't understand until you have a child. I thought that I knew becuase I had lots of neices and nephews and I loved them so much, but you love your own children even more. Just think of how bad the bad things sound, and then realize how good the good must be if people keep wanting to have more kids :)
More than anything I feel so bad for Liv because she is in the process of getting all 4 of her molars in at once, and she has an awful diaper rash :( She is usually a good girl, but I still love her even when she's naughty.

This is my favorite picture right now! 

I told Brady that her eyes just look so happy, but I think he hit the nail on the head when he said 

she looks secure in her happiness.

I want that security to be there for her forever. I hope that she is always herself and feels confident and secure in who she is. I can already see so much of her spirit and personality. She is honestly so amazing. She is funny, and spunky, and smart as a whip. She loves to make us laugh (now every time we ask her if she wants to go 'night night' she says, 'no' and waits for us to laugh and then laughs. I know this is a joke because she used to always say yes, and sometimes even ask to go 'night night') and she is so tender and compassionate. She wants to give us kisses all the time (on the cheek, on the hand, on the other cheek) and she wants to give every dog she sees a kiss (whether its a stuffed animal or a dog in a book, on tv, in real life, or on a calendar in the middle of the aisle at Michael's).

16 month stats

-weight: 5th-10th percentile (18 lbs- still no front facing carseat)

-height: 50th percentile (what?)

Moving on

Things to be HAPPY about

-Our car is still running after 15 yrs. and 140,000+ miles. Its pretty unattractive, the sunroof doesn't work, the leather is starting to rip, its got dents and scratches all over, and it makes really interesting noises, but when you consider all that its been through its actually quite amazing. I like to think that it knows how much we need it to just get us through this last semester. I might actually be sad when we send it to the dump.

-O is very kissy, huggy, and sweet (really I could go on and on). This is what gets me through the days (like today) when she screams at the top of her lungs over and over, for fun.

-Brady does so many nice things for me all the time. For example, he rubs my back pretty much everyday (because I complain that my back hurts pretty much everyday), he lets me takes naps while he watches O, he scrapes the ice and snow off the car, he takes out the trash (I hate taking the trash out so much), he makes dinner when I have to stay late for school, and he tells me I'm beautiful and that I have cute ears (I thought it was funny, but flattering none the less, that he would notice something like that).

-I'm sooo close to being done with DH school, and I've managed to make it through with all A's and one B (darn you Perio I). I have to think of this at least once a day to push myself to jump through the hoops for a few more months.

-I have the best family and in-laws! Its just true, I don't even need to explain it. But I guess I will anyway. My sweet sweet in-laws took Olivia for finals week last semester so B could study for his last finals at BYU and I could study for my finals and Anesthesia Boards. I wouldn't have been able to take my Boards if they hadn't been willing to do that. They also kept her for a few extra days after B and I traveled home (which was a huge blessing because of our crazy drive back) and we had some alone time to get our home in order.

-A new year and a fresh start!

Don't look back, move forward, forgive and forget, live for the future.

This time I promise to try harder. Cheers to 2011.


Also can we take a second to note the date: 1/11/11. I admit to being a dork, but you have to admit its pretty cool.

Pictures

I wanted to at least post some pics since my parents haven't seen Olivia for a while.

 I will do a big post about Christmas in Oregon later (lots of fun!) but just wanted to tell these little stories. While we were walking in town she tripped and fell on her face and has a big blister/scrape on her lip. Her little hand slipped out of mine so fast, I felt so bad! Then, I think it was 1 or 2 days later, she fell and hit her head on the fireplace. That made me teary! She was sooooo sad. B and I both felt so sad for her. Anyway, that's why she has 2 bumps on her face :(

She wanted to walk IN the snow while we walked on the nicely shoveled sidewalk.

 She loved the stairs. She knew she wasn't supposed to go on them unless she was holding someone's hand. That's why she's smiling in the top pic.

She LOVED those dogs and was not afraid to MAKE them play with her.

Update

We traveled home through a huge snow storm on Tuesday and Wednesday. I'll copy and paste my facebook status becuase it pretty much sums up the trip:

"It took us 4 hours to get 2 hours out of town, we were forced to pull off the road and stay the night at a motel, our new car was backed into, we woke to a foot of snow blocking our door, our car doors were frozen shut, and by the time we made it to Utah, there was a giant snow storm goin' on. Thank goodness Liv wasn't with us and that me and B have so much fun together. Life is good, and we are safe!"

Don't feel too bad for us, we actually did enjoy ourselves. Liv was still with G'ma and G'pa Hansen, so we felt more like it was a private/date/adventure.

We de-junked the entire apartment while little Liv was away and while I was still on Christmas vacation. It was amazing to throw that much stuff away (some straight to the dumpster, some to DI, and some given away). Also so weird to me that after getting rid of TONS of crap, we still have so much crap. I feel like we'll be having another de-junking very soon.

We're building an apothecary TV console. Well, the plan was to have it finished before Olivia got home and before school started again, buuuut let's just say the work bench that we bought took a little longer to put together than anticipated- so here we are 1 week into school and not a darn thing done with the large amounts of wood that were purchased. Okay, I lied. We've marked where we need to cut.

With that said, you won't be surprised to hear that we spent most of New Year's Eve de-junking and building the work bench. At 11:15 we headed over to Danee and Howard's to ring in the new year! We're not complete party poopers. We toasted with Martinelli's and shot off some fireworks while admiring some of the neighbors fireworks. Good company, freezing temperatures, things exploding, and good hot chocolate. That's what I call a good New Year's party!

The madness has begun. I've started my last semester of Dental Hygiene school. I know this will be the hardest and most stressful semester of all, and that's saying something (bad) because last semester was a doosey.  Its not the schoolwork that will get me (although, why the h-town would you give students MORE group projects and busy work in their LAST semester when they should be focusing on more important things like BOARDS?), its simply the large amounts of stress and anxiety of National boards exams coming so fast and figuring out how and when to study, as well as the stress of clinic and we all know how great clinic was for me last semester, so I can only imagine what fun surprises my patients have in store for me. Somehow its worked out every other semester, so here's to faith and prayers seeing me through to the end!

Writing is therapeutic. I do love having a record and writing my thoughts and feelings down, and of course I will want to have some recollection of what went on during this crazy stressful time {*especially because Liv is getting so BIG! see below} and , so I've decided to at least write. I don't care if its boring for others to read, or if I don't have pictures to go with each post, or if I'm not fun and creative. Something's gotta give. One day I'll be able to actually spend the time figuring out how to make my blog look pretty, and how to change my header, and how to be creative again. Hopefully I'll still have a few followers when that time rolls around!


*That girl is crazy! Not in a bad way, but in a totally awesome way. She's never been real chill so this is not a huge surprise, but I freaking love her to pieces. She spins and dances and kisses and cuddles and jumps (well tries to jump which is hilarious because she thinks she's doing it) and sings and doesn't stop talking (babbling). Her laugh is contagious which is so good because she laughs all the time and who doesn't need more laughter in their life? She runs into things (not on purpose) and falls on her back (sometimes on her face) and thinks its the funniest thing ever. She loves to be surprised. When I come home from school Brady will open the door and I stand in the entryway and she just RUNS to see who it is, and when she sees me she smiles so big and shrugs her shoulders (she has the BEST shoulder shrug). My heart melts every time.  She loves to push grocery carts (she would rather be out of the cart pushing it than in the seat) and push the buttons on the microwave. She will almost always stop crying if I start singing. She copies us a lot, which keeps us in line :) I taught her the 'I love you' sign last night, so funny when she tries to get her tiny hand in that position. When I rock and sing to her at night, she lays her head on my shoulder and then pops her head up to give me a kiss and lays it back down and then does it again. She is the best thing for me {along the greatest husband ever}.