i'll tell you what

I just need to vent.

I am reallll behind on getting my PEs passed off (which are skills we have to know and pass of with instructors while seeing our patients). I even got called into my Professors office because I'm so behind. I have to defend myself a bit before everyone starts thinking I'm a slacker, bad student, lazy, or whatever else. I have done assessment after assessment after assessment. Good? No, since there literally is nothing I can get passed off while doing assessments. Why have I been doing assessments you ask? Because almost every one of my patient's have cancelled, and I get assigned a front desk patient, who is inevitably a case type 1. Good? No, since I don't even get any credit for the 12 case type 1 quads I've cleaned. Here comes the venting part.

I'm sick of working so hard, doing these assessments, cleaning type 1 quads, and literally having nothing to show for it. I'm sick of calling and calling and calling patients to schedule and confirm them, only to have them cancel or no show. I'm sick of loosing all my core points over things I have absolutely no control over. I'm sick of feeling like I'm so far behind that I'll never catch up. I'm sick of feeling like my life is out. of. control.

This morning I woke early so I could get to school early, because I FINALLY had a case type 3 calculus challenge patient coming at 8. I planned the night before and read over 2 PE's and an LE I would FINALLY be able to pass off. I was excited that I would get to do 6 injections, and FINALLY get to CLEAN the teeth instead of just assessing. I was pumped and ready to start getting these things passed off.

Get to my car, nice and early, turn the key. Silence. Turn the key. Silence. This cannot be happening right now. My car won't start and I NEED to get to school. I NEED to be on my A game today, because I NEED to pass this stuff off. I realize that the only way to get to school now is to drive the scooter. I've never driven the scooter because it scares me, especially now that B just had a little wreck. Sick to my stomach, off I go, wobbling around on the scooter. And now I'm late. Don't worry, its drizzling outside...and ridiculously windy.

Somehow I don't die on my way to school. FRANTIC, I try to get my op set up as fast as possible. I'm already off my A game now. As fate would have it, my patient cancels. Now I'm FRANTICALLY trying to call every person on my patient list. Half don't answer, the other half can't come in. This means I will loose basically all my points for the day, and I won't be passing anything off that I SO DESPERATELY needed too.

Time to go home. I pump myself up to drive the dreaded scooter home, and wouldn't you know it, there was a giant bee sitting on the handle. I know everyone is laughing at how ridiculous I am, but if you know me, you know I'm terrified of bees. TERRIFIED. Now I have to pump myself up just to get this bee off my scooter, so I call B for moral support and do the deed. Drive the scoot home, no drizzling, just windy. Again, I don't die. Yay.

Good things about today:

My sister brought her son in so I didn't loose all my points (even though my CI tried to take them all, I fought her for them).

I didn't die.